I have so many simple dreams. I have a lot of complicated and stupid ones, but I have plenty of simple ones. Running through sprinklers, jumping in pools, pulling over and getting out of the car in the pouring rain, lying in grassy fields, smiling across a dinner table, staring at the stars, driving to nowhere....I could literally go on for hours. But the point is that I miss being in a relationship and enjoying these little things, these little moments, the cuddling and the smiling, the breathing and the heartbeat. It has been years. And I miss it--but it's never worth putting up with the wrong person for it.

I was lying on my front lawn this afternoon, in the shadow of our neighbor's evergreen. I thought about how that lawn grew on the blood of my skinned knees, the tears of fraternal lessons and the sweat of practice. It really made me miss my brother.

I've been feeling nostalgic lately. I don't have the right, and I really don't want to, because it just makes you cry inside, but I guess good memories give us hope.

I'll post my travel log, once I trust my laptop again. Anyway, sorry to those of you that have been checking and not seeing much lately. With the nostalgia came a certain apathy for a lot of things.

But this too will pass.